"The Lines of Louretta"

The Wisdom of Age Project—Hampton Roads, Va. 2017

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Chapt 1: "Regarding Wishful Conversing"

Chapt 2: "Regarding Grief"

Chapt 3: "Regarding Life's Lessons"

Chapt 4: "Regarding A Perfect Day"

About the documentarians

Regarding Wishful Conversing I was sitting on her couch, trying to crush peanut M&Ms between my teeth more quietly than I ever had before. Louretta had left them out for Will Burch and me, right next to a pitcher that had ice cold water waiting for us as soon as we walked in. My body had sunk into the couch in the now familiar spot in which I could face Louretta. Sunlight from her patio hit my cheek as if it were a warm greeting, which was always a nice plus when paired with Louretta’s warm embraces. The dog was barking in the apartment next door, and we decided that today we would discuss wishful conversing. I asked: “Is there anyone alive, or deceased, you would want to have lunch with and why- in terms of having good conversation?” Louretta smiled, then looked up to the ceiling to think. She sat and stared for a little while, and her left hand enclosed around the necklace she was wearing. “I think the ones that I miss, I often have questions I wish I had asked Mom, and of course, my father too.” We smiled at one another, both knowing the feeling of loss so well that it never had to be outright discussed. We went on to talk about family members that we wished we could talk to. What a great thing it is to be able to have a conversation with someone and how little we think of the meaning behind every single sentence we let another person have with or from us as we say it. When discussing her grandfather, Louretta said: “I didn’t really know him as a person. I just knew him as somebody who would reach in his pocket and give you a peppermint.” Her laugh was quickly followed by my own. There it was. The sweet memory of a person being more familiar than their own voice. “I’d like to ask my grandfathers if they ever had by chance met Lincoln.” Her eyes grew two sizes when pondering the very realistic question. “Wouldn’t that be…?” Louretta was shaking her head in a little sense of awe. The idea of time sat in the room right between us. “Can’t imagine that. Not that far along back… at least for me.” We laughed together knowing that sentiment was not defined by the seconds on the clock. What did I learn from Louretta—that whomever you wish you could have had a conversation with would probably be ready to give you a good one if you had just asked them. So have good conversations, always, and make sure to value them. ◊

Regarding Grief Louretta had a wonderful history to tell us of her great love. She married a man named Jerry, who had three lovely children at the time. “By the time I had a family, I was beginning to sort everything that I, myself, personally believed. I was making a pattern of what my own values were, and what I thought was important to teach the kids.” Any time the element of her children are added into a conversation, Louretta straightens up her posture, and her face automatically beams with a smile. There is a sense of pride and longing. Her children do not live as close as she would like, and one of them had sadly passed away years ago. This is a type of loss that does not simply leave itself to remain in one place. It is evident the grief can still be seen in her, but Louretta makes the most out of something she can only choose to learn from. Grief occurs many times in life, and Louretta has experienced both ends of having love, and also losing it. “What would you say to someone who has just had their heart broken, in any way, if could you tell them anything?” Louretta sat back in her chair and took a moment to decide. Her eyes shut ever so briefly before she answered the question—perhaps was flashing. “Not to belittle the tragedy of what you’re feeling, but it does get better with time.” Louretta insists that time truly does help to heal wounds. “Time passing…does wonderful things. Sometimes it takes a long time, other times... its not, not so bad.” She will tell you that these fragments of your heart will be picked up and put back together: it is all out of your control. We are fitting into a bigger frame we may not even consider. “Yeah, if you can just look at it as part of your life…part of what is happening in your life-—and its part of a total picture. "I’m a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. So, when you look at it that way, I think it helps to ease it a little bit?” She had ended this perspective in a question-like stance, but the answer was right. Louretta lost her husband, Jerry, a few years back, and this brought an element of sadness into her life. “I’m just thinking of when my husband died, and so, that was…that was pretty, pretty severe.” Louretta paused as she goes on to tell me that heartbreak can, in fact, be healed. Grief does mend itself, even if that mending takes time. “But you do get past it,” she says as she sighs with a softened smile. "No one gets through life without having those times. So just, accept it I guess.” ◊

When she sits, it is with a posture more elegant than anyone I have ever met. She is graceful in all that she is, and I find myself sitting more upright as she stares across the coffee table at me.

Her walls are painted dark teal and red, with a warm collision of the two colors calling out that this is a nice home to be in. This place is safe, welcoming, and it is where Louretta lives. I constantly try to make sure I am maintaining eye contact as I write down notes of what she is saying on my phone, yet Louretta has been writing her own story this entire time. This soothing paint on her walls holds memories of wisdom and vibrant times. She has had a life in which she was on her own personal rollercoaster, relishing the highs, and resonating in the lows. Her eyebrows raise almost as if they are greeting my own in anticipation of the next question, so I ask: “In regards to chapters in your book, which would you say are the best and worst chapters, and why?” I asked these things not hesitantly, but with a big gulp in the back of my throat. These questions are not always easy to answer, but this woman is wise, and she is willing. “The worst? I think when I was in Florida when my husband died.” Her eyes started to water, but Louretta maintained perfect and steady eye contact with me. “And getting that phone call was just a nightmare. Guess there is not a lot to be said about that—it just speaks for itself.” Both the best and worst chapters involved the love of her life. “And the best I guess was the day I married him. Ever since he was in my life, my life got…it was very special. I mean it was, we had very difficult times, just because of the situation. You know, with the ready-made family and everything. But he brought a lot of good to my life. And being part of a big family, to me, is such a gift.” Her husband played a crucial role in so many life experiences, but so did many other people she was close to. And all of those memories help "because now, when you sort of have to take a different road? ◊

Regarding A Perfect Day Louretta’s idea of a perfect day is so sincere. It starts off with the setting. She leaned forward with her answer at the ready. “I would probably be outside. I would like it if I would be able to do a lot of walking, but I can’t.” Louretta has had back problems for some time now, and they prevent her from walking for long distances and long durations. “Because I used to love to walk. And it would also be nice if it involved people, but if it didn’t I would be alright, by myself. I’m okay with myself.” I smile at the fact that Louretta is so comfortable speaking about her comfort and independence. “It would probably have to have some music in it,” she says as she pads at her tissue in hand. Her eyes are emphasizing every suggestion she makes, and she nods as if we are making a plan for this day to truly happen. In my mind, I would be more than happy to make this day into a reality. I have a feeling it will happen at some point. As comfortable and confident as Louretta is with herself. She goes on to say, “A time for reading, and probably talking to someone. Either by phone or in person. I think it would make it more complete that way, because I, um, I am a people person. I’m fine for a while, but its nice to have others too.” Louretta says this while she nods in the direction of both me and Will. I realize that this day could be one that we share together sometime in the future. I smiled back at Louretta, knowing what friendship meant and having my heart swell in the moment because of it. The knowledge I acquired after hearing her talk about her perfect day was that she would most likely be a component in the description of my own. ◊

Mary Hanula was born and raised in Arlington, Virginia, right outside of Washington D.C. She is an only child, but often considers that she was not, seeing as she has had her dog, Ariel, as her best friend for a majority of her life. She is an English major and a Civic Engagement minor, and intends on pursuing a career in writing of any sort after she graduates in 2018. She is an incredibly vibrant spirit and it shows in every encounter that she takes part in, whether it be a complete stranger or one of her best friends. Friends like her are of the rarest kind. William Burch is currently a Junior at Christopher Newport University. He is majoring in Communications, and also pursuing a Minor in Photography and Video Arts. Will was born and raised in Richmond, Virginia. He has one sister at JMU, and two loving parents. He is most passionate about taking photos of the people and the world around him. Will enjoys playing basketball, volleyball, and watching The Office in his free time. After Will graduates in the spring of 2018, he plans on pursuing his passions in whichever way will let him explore the world. He values his friendships and holds his character to the highest degree. Will Burch is a name that people should take note of remembering, whether it be from this work or the kind soul he embodies. Projects aren't just projects to Will. He puts his heart and soul into his work, which you will be able to see here.

"The Lines of Louretta"

story by Mary Hanula

documentary film by Will Burch

I put Louretta Wilson on the spot. "What would be a good title for your book, a book about your life?" Just like that she said, “Well I…um, well…I suppose: What’s Next.” As she sat and looked at her ceiling- blue eyes darting around like wise pinballs off the teal colored walls- she had come up with the perfect words to describe it. Her life story is a wonderful one. She has been through heartbreak, through loss, through both happy and sad times. Through it all- Louretta wants to know: what is next? The "chapters" that I have written about Louretta, and the film that my classmate Will Burch produced, highlight just a few examples of what would be in Louretta’s book. We can only try to do justice relaying a life we now consider such a special part of our own. These are her stories and, at eighty-one years old, she shares guidance and wisdom in her lines and her song.

"Louretta's Song" (5:22)